Humor/Satire

Breaking News: Jesuit Roundup introduces Pillory as Punishment for Recalcitrant Writers

After several failures of literary and journalistic merit arising from associate editors and freshmen staff writers, his most holy, exultant, blessed, and glorious Dr....

Four Reasons Ronaldo is the GOAT

In spite of Ronaldo's recent achievements in Saudi Arabia, many, many soccer fans across the globe have concluded that Ronaldo is worse than Messi....

This isn’t funny

Like the ominous clouds lingering on the distant horizon, evil's echos tremble in every fold of fabric in the days of our lives. Every...

Somebody Shot Cupid

To truly understand Valentine's Day and its movement toward the shallow existence it holds today, one must understand its roots. So this article begins...

My Biggest Gripe as Media Editor

Intro Picture this: You are finding your groove while editing your video. You are struggling to piece together your film or video, but now you...

Sigh…The Cowboys fall to the Commanders in a disappointing Week 18

The Cowboys suffered a brutal loss to the Washington Commanders on Sunday, losing an embarrassing 26-6. After this game, I do not see how...

An Art Hero Walks Among Us

One dark and stormy night, Mr. Goll noticed a leak in the roof, damaging a painting. In an act of bravery and honor, he...

Satan Relocates Hell to California

Hell has happily tortured damned souls for the last several thousand years below the Earth's surface. But Director of Operations, Satan, has found a...

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Jesuit Baseball Begins Season With Weatherford Invitational

After a brief period of scrimmages to start the...

The Supreme Court Rebukes Donald Trump’s Tariffs

And so, we come to a final adjudication: Donald...

Six More Athletes Join a Class of 14 College Signees

On Thursday, February 5, Jesuit Athletics participated in its...

2026 Texas Democratic Senate Primary Preview

The 2026 Midterm Elections are shaping up to be...