It is hardly an overreaction to say that the NFL has gotten way too dangerous to keep alive. There’s too much physicality, and nobody tunes in so that they can watch three different replays of a torn ACL. It’s gotten way out of hand. Players are tearing their ligaments like velcro shoes. I won’t stand for it anymore. The NFL needs to move to a much more safe method of playing football, or disband forever. But, not to worry, I’ve already crafted a perfect plan for the NFL to keep themselves alive while simultaneously keeping their players completely safe. In fact, I’ve created multiple perfect plans that all accomplish the ultimate goal of complete and utter player safety.
Team Captains Represent Their Team in Madden
This would change the game, but you can’t deny that this would be completely safe. Here’s the idea. The three team captains of each team will represent their team weekly in their NFL scheduled game, but it will be through Madden gameplay. CBS and Fox can stream the gameplay and have the team captains faces in the top right corner. There is still strategy, there are still big hits, and everything great about the NFL will still be there. In fact, this would allow the NFL to add new potential features to their game that weren’t already possible with a traditional game. For example, a power-up that gives a kicker a ten point boost in overall that can be used at any time, or a redo button that allows a team to do over a play if something bad happens. The only issue I see with this is an internet connection issue.
Now, it would change how free agency worked. Good Madden players would get paid the big bucks, but it would still be necessary to be a good player, because teams would still want you on their Madden team. So, a 99 overall that sucks at Madden would still likely get a big contract so that the team captains can use them in game. Overall, I think this method allows for complete player safety while also keeping the product generally the same. However, there is still a risk of a ligament tear in the thumb or fingers. We can’t risk that, and we can do better.
Two-Hand Touch Seven on Seven
Nobody even likes tackles anyway. I’d much rather watch a defender touch his two hands to the offensive player for the play to be dead. Within that is the challenge of getting both hands on the offensive player as well. It’s not easy. Wouldn’t it be amazing to see a running back in space make a nice juke that prevents the defender from getting both hands on him? Let me tell you, just the idea is exciting. Furthermore, eleven players on each team is way too much in my opinion. With more players on the field, there’s a higher risk of injury because the field is clogged. Moving it to seven on seven allows for pretty much the same idea, but it eliminates the extra dangerous offensive/defensive line. We don’t need that anyway, just have a sack timer, where quarterbacks get five seconds in the pocket, and if the timer expires, a referee politely informs them that they have been “virtually sacked.”
I like this idea particularly because it’s more relatable. Kids at home don’t play tackle football in the street with their friends, they play two-hand touch. Also, they almost never have twenty-two people, normally it gets up to fourteen at the most. So, kids at home will be able to relate to the players by playing the very same game in their neighborhood streets. I believe that this allows for a changed but better product, but the injury risk is still way too high. Someone could jump to make a catch and land awkwardly on a defender’s foot and boom, torn ligament. This is way too dangerous to be acceptable for the NFL. We need a new idea. Something different, that will completely eliminate the danger of the physical sport of football.
AI-Generated NFL Games
This is my best work. We’ve all seen just how powerful AI can be when it’s generating. I’m confident it can create a perfect replication of real NFL football. No CTE. No torn ligaments. Just pure AI generated perfection. Teams could pay the AI developers rather than the players to get better results. We would be watching a real-life accurate depiction of the NFL. This is the only option that removes all of the danger. I know that everyone is worrying about AI taking over the world or whatever, but if Roger Goodell really cares about his players, he should implement this rule in a heartbeat.
Sure, there may be some minor issues. The AI might accidentally give the Cowboys twelve touchdowns in one game, or it might forget that a team is supposed to have eleven players on the field. Maybe the quarterback has three arms one week, or the referee suddenly becomes a 400-foot-tall robot. But these are all fixable problems. The NFL already has replay review, so they could simply review the AI-generated game afterward and ask it to regenerate anything that looked weird. If the AI refuses, Goodell can fine it. If it keeps refusing, suspend it for four games. The NFL has plenty of experience with discipline.
There is also the possibility that AI-generated players become so realistic that fans begin to believe they’re watching actual football. Honestly, I don’t see a problem with this. If anything, it would make the NFL even better. Imagine watching a game-winning touchdown and never having to worry about whether the receiver landed safely. The AI can simply generate the perfect landing every time. If the running back gets tackled awkwardly, regenerate it. If a quarterback throws an interception that wasn’t supposed to happen, regenerate it. If the Jets make the playoffs, regenerate the entire season.
Conclusion
There are a lot of arguments for what the NFL should do to prevent injury. But the NFL doesn’t need better helmets, softer turf, or fewer tackles. It just needs to stop putting humans on the field altogether. AI is the future of football. And if the AI eventually takes over the league, that’s a problem for the AI’s commissioner to deal with. At least nobody will tear a ligament.
