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Humor/Satire

Humorous or Satirical Student Views, Opinions, and Commentary

Campus Life

Why I Switched to the Dark Side

Apple's reign as America's most popular cell phone manufacturer has gone unchallenged for too long! Two years ago, I decided I could no longer live...
Reed Zimmermann '19, Managing Editor -
Campus Life

Brother, Why Must I Park Far?

For years, Jesuit students who fail to get a junior lot parking pass have been pushed to the outskirts of the school and forced...
Noah Johnson '18 -
Humor/Satire

These People NEED to be in the NBA Celebrity All-Star Game

On Friday, February 17th, at 7 p.m. ET, ESPN will broadcast the 2017 NBA All-Star Celebrity Game live from Mercedes-Benz Superdome in New Orleans,...
William Heckel '17 -
Humor/Satire

5 Things that are Better than Pizza

Ah, pizza. Multiple mounds of melted, magnificently manufactured mozzarella shelter a circular, sweeping, savory sauce covering a curved, copious, crunchy-chewy crust. The delight of...
James Patterson '16 -
Humor/Satire

The End of The 28?

Mr. Garrison, incredulous, shakes his head and mumbles incoherently to himself as he takes out a sharpie to make amends to the 28 Acre...
Joseph Duebner '16 -
Humor/Satire

2014 Christmas Gift Guide

Are you looking for the perfect gift for a family member or friend this Christmas? Do you have a secret Santa for whom you...
Joseph Duebner '16 -
Humor/Satire

Valedictorian Grant Uy A Grammatical Hoax, Horror Runs Through the English Department

"Grant Uy's reign of terror has finally come to an end," commented senior counselor Mr. Oglesby, referencing the shocking scandal that has begun to...
Grant Uy '14 -
Humor/Satire

Christmas Girlfriend No-Nos

Well, it’s that time of year, and if you have a girlfriend and for some reason have decided to look to me for advice...
Drew Curran '15 -
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